Saturday, January 14, 2006

Presenting....

One day, while beating the tar out of each other, Duke said something that altered Spooks naive little existance.
"You know you're not a dog, don't you?" Duke said.
Spook stopped swatting clawlessly at Duke nose long enough to give him a 'what are you, stupid?' look. "Of course I'm a dog. What the hell else would I be?"
"Duh," replied Duke as he placed his big paw on Spooks head and pushed it to the ground. "You're a cat."
"What?! A cat?! You're insane! I'm just as much dog as you are. Ask Mom and Dad!"
"I don't have to ask Mom and Dad. I know what you are. I've been around longer than you have, you know. Ow, stop biting my ear."
Spook kept biting. Duke was starting to tick him off. "Fine. I want proof. Evidence. Facts. I watch C.S.I. I know how it works."
"Ok, let's start with the food," Duke said.
"What about it?" asked Spook.
"Didn't you ever wonder why your bowl has pictures of cats on it?"
"Isn't that what dog food is made of?"
"Umm, no. Also, haven't you ever wondered why you got declawed? Mom and Dad never had me declawed. And what about the litter box? Dog's don't use litter boxes. We just crap anywhere."
"Are you sure?" By now, Spook had stopped trying to wrap his paws around Duke's throat. This was getting worrisome. "Ok, then explain the, uh.....um. Damn. What else ya got?"
Duke was starting to enjoy this. "You get to sleep on the bed. I don't. You get to stay home alone for a few days. I have to go to a kennel. You don't wear a collar. I do."
"Maybe they just love me more."
"Ya. Sure. That's it." Duke was starting to get annoyed, now. " Look, buddy. I've been here longer than you. I've seen more of the world than this house. You wanna play dog once in a while, fine. But you're a cat. And dogs are in charge of cats. End of story." Stupid cat.
After the initial shock of this discovery, Spook starting thinking. Cat thinking. "So I can be evil, can't I?"
"What?"
"Well, aren't cats evil? I mean, don't they live to hatch evil plots that would end in the demise of their parents? Oh! I just realized! That must be why I have the uncontrollable urge to trip Mom and Dad when they are going down the stairs! It all makes sense now!"
Looking slightly worried, Duke replied, "Uh, ya. I suppose. But you don't really want to hurt Mom and Dad, right? You love them, right?"
"Oh. Ya. Sure. Love them. Right,"said Spook. Then he muttered under his breath, "Love them, kill them. Tomayto, tomahto."
"What was that?" Duke asked, ears perked up.
"Nothing."

To be continued......

Click here to see a picture of the real life Duke and Spook.

17 Comments:

Blogger ribbiticus said...

wouldn't it be wonderful if we could actually hear and understand when dogs and cats carried out actual conversations? this was nicely whimsical. will await the continuation! michele sent me today. :)

12:50 PM  
Blogger Lazy Daisy said...

Way too funny! You have a beautiful site. Michele sent me.

12:56 PM  
Blogger Romanduck said...

I am just frankly stunned that you have ANIMALS that can TALK! WOW!!!

Michele sent me!!!

1:04 PM  
Blogger ribbiticus said...

hey, tara! michele sent me back. enjoyed it the second time around...:)

1:28 PM  
Blogger Carmi said...

They are so sweet! Reminds me of why we have pets in the first place.

Our black cat had a similar white patch under his face. He looked like a little minister.

1:31 PM  
Blogger Mama B said...

Sometimes I wonder what my dog is thinking.
I stumbled upon your blog. I will be back later to read more.

2:22 PM  
Blogger Sandy said...

Ha! Sounds like a beautiful friendship though.

2:48 PM  
Blogger Ciera said...

oh my gosh! Thanks for visiting my blog earlier! I love the story! I'll have to stop back now!

2:57 PM  
Blogger Ciera said...

*blushes* I was just here! I didn't even look to see who was above me at Michele's! So, hello again! *blushing still*

2:59 PM  
Blogger The Mistress of the Dark said...

LOL! In my household the dog thinks he's a cat.

Michele sent me :)

3:05 PM  
Blogger valbee said...

Even before you stopped by my blog (thank you!), I was planning on dropping a line here. I *LOVE* the story about Duke and Spook and I hope you will continue to post their adventures. And the picture is awesome as well!

3:14 PM  
Anonymous Claire said...

That was so funny!!

4:51 PM  
Anonymous mar said...

nice story! Michele sent me !

1:22 PM  
Blogger utenzi said...

That does look like a yummy Spook tail there, Tara. I think Duke has the right idea.

I suspect the end of this story will be very... illuminating. By the way, is Spook still with you? Evil cats!

On an unrelated note, my tenure on your blog is nearly up. It's been very nice to be nestled up on your right side. I'll be very sad to go, Tara. :-(

6:04 PM  
Blogger Gooberman said...

Funny posting! Great minds think alike, I just posted something on Friday about how my cat thinks he is a dog. You gotta love them!
By the way, Michele did not send me, but one of her followers sent me.

6:42 PM  
Blogger Andi said...

LOL! Wish I knew what my cat thought .... eh maybe not...!

6:45 PM  
Blogger utenzi said...

*evil chuckle* It was I, Dave, that sent Gooberman to your post, sweet Tara of Canada.

Michele sent me off to his post just after I read this post by you. So I mentioned your post to him. Amazing how these things link up!

1:20 AM  

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