Monday, March 06, 2006

Look out!

Did anyone get a good look at the tornado that drifted through my house, rearranging everything I own, in every single room? Height, eye color, liscense plate number? No?


How the hell can a little teeny tiny bathroom cause SO much chaos in the rest of a house? There is a sink and a toilet on my stair landing. Drywall, tools and light fixtures in my dining room. Backerboard beside my coat closet. A mirror and some shelves blocking my daughter's room. A bathroom DOOR is in front of my office door, requiring me to suck in and be 16 year old skinny again just to get to my computer, and there is dust and dirt and CRAP on every floor. Not to mention, no dishes or laundry have been done, since all of the electrical and plumbing work had the power and water turned off.

Don't get me wrong. I'm glad it's getting done. And hubby and I work great together. I know some married couples can't put up a wallpaper border together without filing for divorce, but we do very well. He's like the surgeon and I'm his nurse. (get your dirty dirty minds out of the gutter, we're talking about renovating still). I just watch what he's doing, then hand him the tool he needs before he even asks for it. Then, when it's my turn (drywalling and painting and possibly tiling), I just wait until he's at work.

Because he's not as good of a nurse as I am.

In the meantime, my house looks like a pile of garbage. See?

Just kidding! That was the dump. The neatest and most organized dump in the WORLD.

Didn't dumps used to be, ya know, dumps? And it was great. Piles and piles of other peoples' garbage that piles and piles of other people picked through and took home. (Not me. I was never allowed to garbage pick. But it was fun to watch other people do it. But I did find a marble once, when I was about 6. It was a jumbo glassy. Don't tell my mom) It was the ultimate recycle program!

The dump around here is cleaner than my house is right now. There are neat and tidy piles of very specific things. Wood over there, drywall here, paper in this bin, bottles over there, etc. It kinda takes the fun out of it. The only redeeming fun-ness (sure, that's a word), is the great big glittering pile of broken glass. On a sunny summer day, it's one of the prettiest things I've ever seen. Unfortunately, it's burried in snow right now. I'll get ya'll a picture in the summertime.

Yes, I'm that weird.

So, today is cleaning day. Although, I'm not sure why I bother. It's going to get horrible again as soon as The Great Renovater comes home from work. How do they keep it clean on all these fix-up shows? They hire people to clean up right behind them, don't they? I bet that's it. So, any volunteers? Bring your own gloves.

And keep your hands off my husband's behind. Ya, I read ya'll gushing about it.

I have an ongoing relieve-my-reno-stress project on the go. It's a knit shawl with crochet edges. Or at least I WAS, until applejuice was spilled on it. If it's salvaged, I'll show pics. The design project is on hold untill I can devote more than a few minutes at a time. I am also in the beginning stages of another freebie pattern.

Assuming I can suck in my stomach enough to get back out of this office. If not, the crack is big enough to pass coffee through. I take it with cream and sugar twin. Thanks.


Blogger utenzi said...

Tara, that was a post that really traveled all over the place. I hope your bathroom is finished soon so the dirt hurricane will be over for y'all.

11:47 a.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's amazing what a mess renovating creates! What stops my husband & I from recarpeting the computer room is moving all that stuff!!

When I was a kid, our town had dump nights in the summer where you can put all your junk out with the garbage cans and it would get picked up. On those nights, my brother and I would go around and find 'treasures' that other people were throwing out. Of course that gave my parents heart attacks because we went out after dinner without asking and we were only 4 and 7 at the time!!

12:05 p.m.  
Blogger LinknKnits said...

I couldn't even tell that the first picture was a dump! It looked an artsy collage or something. You could make a Cafe Press poster out of it or something... hee hee hee.

2:37 p.m.  
Blogger Lucy said...

Your house makes the pic I posted on my blog of my garbage bags after my son cleaned his room look like a scrap of paper on the floor....Good Luck!!! But I'm sure I will be jealous of that nice bathroom you'll be getting!

6:30 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow, that tornado really gets around. Since I started working, I have had little time to clean up around the house...and noone else seems to be able to do it. One of these days, I am going to get fed up and clean it

I hope that your bathroom gets finished soon

10:47 p.m.  

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