Monday, June 05, 2006

The Shed That Love Built

This weekend was for shed building. Or at least yesterday was. Saturday it rained all day. And power tools are SO persnickety in the rain.

So yesterday was for shed building.

Hubby, although lacking in construction experience, seems to have picked up a lot of skill and knowledge along the way. After his forays into kitchen and bath renovation, I was impressed to see how much he knew about building something from scratch. From the ground up, as they say.

I, on the other hand, had previous experience. I don't like to brag (much), but I took a carpentry class in high school (about a billion years ago), and we built a cottage addition. Which turns out, is very similar to a shed. And I was the top student in the class (and the only girl, thank you very much).

The biggest advantage I had over all of the boys in the class, besides the basic ability to do math and the brains to not cut off appendages in various sharp and electric tools, was hammering. I rock at hammering. Being the only girl, they were constantly trying to prove that they could do a better job than me, so they would challenge me to a hammering contest almost every class.

And I would beat them ALL. Mwhahahahahahaha.

So, I'm a good hammerer.

At least I was. In high school. A billion years ago.

The shed itself went very smoothly yesterday. Perfection. Perfect cuts. Perfectly square. Perfect. And I got to hammer me some nails.

That's when I learned something about myself. Years and years of carpal tunnel tend to leave a girl's wrist kind of...well....wobbly.

So, I had to wear a wrist brace. Which required me to hold the hammer a little differently, about a third of the way up the handle. Well, that's just not the right way to hold a hammer. You don't get all of the power of the swing unless you hold the handle at the end. But, I was still getting the job done, so it was OK.

Then I hit my thumb.

Ya, I know. Everyone hits a thumb sometimes while hammering. Including me. This one was a doozy, however. Instant blood blister. It really, really hurt.

Writhing around on the ground kind of hurt.

After that, my thumb was a little shy while hammering. I had trouble getting the nail into the wood because I would try to time my swing and the release of the nail simultaneously so as not to hit my thumb again. Thus requiring a LOT more swings (and misses). After a while, my wrist started getting sore, so I used both hands to hammer. Little tiny swings from halfway up the handle using both hands and wincing in fear that my thumb may be hit. And that's when I realized it. Me, the hammer champ of my high school carpentry class.....HAMMERING LIKE A GIRL!

I was so embarrassed.

Then hubby hit his thumb. Then he hit it again. So, I asked him if he was just trying to make me feel better, or trying to win some kind of sick contest. Then I dropped a 2x4x12 on the back of my ankle. More writhing around in pain. Then hubby yelped again. This time it was his pinky.

Our twisted little game of who-can-injure-themselves-in-the-most-spectacular-way-without-actually-requiring-the-emergency-room went on throughout the day.

I finally asked him if it might be more time efficient if we just started hitting each other with hammers.

The jerk looked like he was contemplating it.

Eventually, we had the four walls up. And then it got dark. So we stopped. Because it's one thing swing and miss in the daylight, but in the dark it could be a bloodbath.

And that is the story of the shed that love, well, half built.

And for those of you wondering about the photo.....I was using photoshop to crop and resize and all that jazz, but after a half an hour and two cups of coffee and no final product in sight, I learned my most important photoshop lesson yet: Sometimes it's faster and easier to just use the old program that you know how to use. Tada.


Blogger Useless Man said...

I had to build our shed. I put out the mennonite light in the sky, but the only one to show up was my Dad. I guess barns take precidence.

And I'm not a mennonite. Not sure if they even use a superhero calling light, or not. Or phones for that matter.

What do I know? I'm useless.

11:20 a.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh man! The heartbreak of carpel tunnel syndrome!

ROFLMAO!! Not at your misfortune, of course, but the way wrote about your unfortunate series of injuries. It's why I stick to holding the flashlight--much safer. :)

11:42 a.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'd rather be hammering than the project I have to get around to very soon at my house: sanding down the walls of what is soon to be my bedroom. I hate sanding.

BTW, I'll have you know that you were responsible (indirectly) for half of the weekend fun I had... I started messing with those Photoshop tutorials. I might post some stuff. I might not. We'll see.

12:45 p.m.  
Blogger Unknown said...

ROFL....Sounds like you at least had some fun, even though it was pain. Shed is looking good so far. Sould have had a couple of cocktails first. LOL

1:19 p.m.  
Blogger Christy said...

Thank you for the great laugh! Not the laugh at you, but it seems like you had fun anyway! Great blog!!

3:40 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I never realized that shed building could be so dangerous!


5:07 p.m.  
Blogger Jana said...

i like to hammer too. i am the handy person around here, hubby has the brains. you can come out here and redo my shed!

10:27 a.m.  
Blogger Joanna said...

Your new shed is looking good!

I found your blog when you requested to be my new renter for this week. I picked you and I am sending people to your site so expect people coming by to say hello. I hope this is a good week for you. Its nice to meet you!

3:56 p.m.  
Blogger .:Cris:. said...

I HAD to comment on this- your shed, as it stands in this picture- looks like the shed that my husband started one year ago on Father's Day. I loaded your blog to read and went to the kitchen and came back to find him reading, and laughing. Too funny, ty for sharing!

10:06 a.m.  

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