Friday, November 17, 2006

NaBloPoMo Post 17

I just spent the morning discussing childbirth with a good friend of mine. She is preggo with her third, and possibly her fourth. The doctor thinks she has a rather large uterus and wants her to get an ultrasound to see if it is twins.

Poor girl.

At some point, the conversation came around to the old men-will-never-ever-understand-what-childbirth-feels-like-and-don't-get-to-comment-on-it-unless-they-are-being-extra-sympathetic line of thought. And that brought us around to the logical discussion that says the-only-thing-men-can-compare-the-pain-of-childbirth-to-is-a-good-kick-in-the-you-knows-and-even-that-only-lasts-a-few-minutes.

Somehow, though, we started wondering (in that riled up way that only riled up women talking to each can do) if a good kick in the you knows is REALLY all that painful. I mean, I know how the men react when it happens. They cry and turn white and curl up on the ground and maybe even throw up. And none of that is good. Which is why the you knows have been used as a weapon since the beginning of time. They are a wonderful last resort for anyone losing a fight.

BUT, I have a theory. What if, based on centuries of men reacting to a good kick in the you knows, men have now been conditioned to react that way even if it didn't hurt? There MUST be a guy or two out there with you knows made of steel that only feel a mild discomfort when kicked. But, if they DON'T fall to the ground and hyperventillate, do other men then judge them and think "he must have pretty small you knows for that not to hurt?"

Because women don't do that with childbirth. If it hurts, it HURTS. And we will tell everyone who will listen that it hurt. But if it DIDN'T hurt all that much, we will brag about that, too. And nobody is judging us on how much our uterus hurt during labor.

So, maybe, just maybe, when you kick a man in the you knows, he is really just reacting the way he has been conditioned to react in order to maintain his aura of man-li-ness, and it really didn't cause that much pain at all. So maybe they should just suck it up and quit whining. Either that or try pushing a couple of babies out.

But that's just a theory. I'm not planning on testing it, or anything.


Blogger Christy said...

yes -YES! So true Tara. My husband is guilty of faking to some extent! I often wondered about all this myself!

I say an uber-secret test is in order LOL

1:13 p.m.  
Blogger Unknown said...

OMG how funny! i'd say your theroy is right on! i say the only way to find out is for them to carry a baby while taking care of the house and children and working part time and then also being able to 'put out' for the wife. (LOL) then they can push the baby out after 9 months of uncomfortable breathing... sigh.. that would be something extrodinary to see. LOL can you tell i'm having FUN with this?
UH OH too much fun??

4:16 p.m.  

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