Monday, January 01, 2007

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I know. I said I would be here to tell you all of my new year's resolutions before midnight. Well, I didn't. I guess I lied. Or misinformed. Whatever. Let's just mark that down as resolution number one. Ok? Does THAT make you happy? Good.

Now, lets' get on to the resolutions. Please keep your arms, legs and other various appendages and body parts inside the blog at all times. For reals. You should see the last guy that didn't. Lost an elbow. Seriously. Can you imagine life without an elbow? So, pay attention.

Resolution Number One:

No more 'lying' to my blog readers. Even if it wasn't technically a lie. I just ran out of time. Ok, no. THAT was a lie. I had a light work day yesterday. But, I started the day off 2 hours away with a hungover husband that drank too much while yapping all night with his father, and a 4 year old telling everyone she saw that "Daddy exploded red wine. EXPLODED." It was a long day. So, I opted to watch 'Superman Returns' instead of getting on the computer. I just changed my mind, that's all. It's not the same as lying. So, I'm not going to apologize anymore. In fact, I'm changing the first resolution.

NEW Resolution Number One:

Stop changing my mind.

Oh......oops. Well. we'll work on that one.

Resolution Number Two:

I need to crochet more. I barely even touched a hook since October. OCTOBER. I've been so busy. And tired. But, I started something this weekend. And it was nice. Just holding the hook and yarn again was nice. And, how can I show off what I make, if I don't make it, right?

Resolution Number Three:

Show off more. I know. I show off EVERYTHING. But, I feel I could do more. But, I will just have to accomplish more so I can show it off. Right? Speaking of which, I have something to show off now. Check this out.


My first sign design. Obviously I have wiped out any identifying features, since it's my dad's store. And I take no credit for the use of font. Seriously. I tried to get him to change it. He wanted Comic Sans MS font. He was insistent. Whatever. Look! I'm up in lights! If you count the distant street lights at the end of the parking lot. And forget that my name is not actually on it. And I DO.


Resolution Number Four:

To take over the WORLD.....MWAHAHAAHAH......

Ooops. Did I say that out loud? Ok, ignore that one.

REAL Resolution Number Four:

I think I may need just a touch more coffee. I'll let ya'll know how that works out.

Resolution Number Five:

I need to stop eating. No, not entirely. Just the pigging out part. I used to be so young and cute and skinny. I can't do much about the young part, but I can work on cute and skinny. I want to be hot again. I want customer boyfriends. You retail girls know what I mean. Those guys that think that because you are nice to them you must looooove them. So he comes in all the time and makes sure he gets to talk to you. Because you're a hot girl that is nice to him. Not that it's your JOB or anything, to be nice to EVERYONE, even the creepy old guy that changes the topic 16 times in one sentence, or the lady that thinks leopard print scrunchies are the PERFECT accessory to skin tight leggings and a long white sweatshirt with her zodiac sign in glittery kittens on the front. I want one of those poor, naive men to choose me. ME. I want to be somebody's pretend girlfriend. Is that so much to ask? So, ya. No more food.

Resolution Number Six:

I need a haircut more than once a year. I think I will work on that. It's a hard one, though. Getting my hair cut is like losing a limb. It hurts. HURTS. I see all of my pretty, pretty hair falling to the floor and I want to cry. But, I know better. I KNOW. I know that getting it cut every once in a while is GOOD for my hair. So, I will go every three months. Starting this month. That makes it...(please hold while Tara attempts mathematics in her head)...4 haircuts before next New Years. I can do that. Right? Right.

Resolution Number Seven:

To be more mysterious. My zodiac sign, Scorpio, says I am supposed to be mysterious. But, I can't help feeling that I am slightly less than mysterious. What with the blog and the loquaciousness and all the showing off. So, I will be more mysterious.

In fact, I think I will start right now by leaving this room and.......

You're wondering what I did, aren't you? I'm not telling. See. Very mysterious.

Resolution Number Eight:

To do everything in multiples of seven.....Oh. Dammit. Nevermind. I'll try that one again next year.


Ok. You're turn. Tell me your best resolution. I especially want to hear from you lurkers.

13 Comments:

Blogger Lucy said...

My best resolution....to get to work on time!!! (my current saying is: Getting to work on time sure makes for a long day!)
Happy New Year!!!!

9:28 AM  
Blogger Marvie said...

Delurking for a moment to say my best resolution is... to not loose my everlovin' mind during the crazy moving-across-the-ocean- into-temp-lodging then moving-from-temp-lodging-into-a-real place ordeal. And drink lots of coffee ;)

10:19 AM  
Anonymous colleen said...

Those are great. I think most of us also need to sign up for number 5. Besides getting video clips on the blog, I'm thinking I need to dance more, which also means more music. Michele sent me over.

10:30 AM  
Blogger Sue said...

Now those are what I call resolutions! They're fab! Good luck with them espcially #5. It doesn't hurt to have a following. It's very good for the soul.

My resolutions? Just one. I need to laugh more and plan on it starting now. hehe. I have two teens, need I say more?

10:58 AM  
Blogger Christy said...

Tara! You crack me up!! This might be weird but my one and only resolution is to NOT diet. Diets fail. I'm not gonna fail. So there diet-smiet. Plus- that takes off all the pressure! :)

Happy New Year!

11:02 AM  
Anonymous Valbee said...

First let me say that after reading this post, I realized how very much I have missed you. :)

Now... on the resolution part. I'm resolving to jazz up my blog with more photos. I'm far too wordy (this comment would be a good example).

Aside from that, I've set goals for this year (mostly financial), but not resolutions so much. The Boyfriend and I are going to start working out together, so you can count that one if you'd like. But really? It's all about the blog photos.

12:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Delurking....I actually keep my resolutions all year. Imagine that! But I go for small things that matter to me. This year's resolution...no more buying magazines. I have a serious addiction and it adds up to $1000 (at least) a year on subscriptions. It's going to be a tough year.

12:59 PM  
Anonymous stacey said...

Retail boyfriends are awesome. Especially when they're cute and younger than me.

I don't do resolutions so much, but I'm aiming to write more.

1:07 PM  
Anonymous Anne said...

I miss my retail boyfriends... and I'm with you on the haircut one.

I don't do resolutions, but my goal (again) this year is not to have any surgery. Heh.

2:48 PM  
Blogger noricum said...

Normally I don't really do resolutions, but, coincidentally at the end of december, I've decided to knit/crochet my stash under control, so that it fits easily inside the two rubbermaid storage tubs. I'm still allowing myself to add to stash, but that only increases the amount I need to knit/crochet from stash. ;)

3:41 PM  
Blogger Amanda said...

I posted my resolutions on my blog, also. I didn't put this on the list, but I also want to crochet more this year.

6:17 PM  
Blogger Amanda said...

I posted my resolutions on my blog, also. I didn't put this on the list, but I also want to crochet more this year.

6:17 PM  
Blogger Vanessa said...

One of my resolutions is to be more financially organized. I need to be more aware of where exactly my money is all going.

7:55 PM  

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